Monday, January 21, 2013

What I Need

In her feature article, Chris at Zenquility got me thinking about what I need in my life (besides the obvious food, water, clothing, family, etc.). Problem is, I sometimes don't know, and the needs change.  So I decided this morning to make a little list of what I know right now.  A lot of it has to do with work because work keeps me on track and helps give meaning to my life.

  • a schedule mandated by work, but with some flexibility
  • a place to go to work to get me out my own head and environment
  • a harassment-free workplace
  • a place that doesn't require me to keep secrets or lie to people
  • a place where I won't be required to play politics
  • a workplace where people understand my disabilities and needs and respect them
  • a place that actually addresses problems as much as possible instead of ignoring them
  • a job that yields a physical product
  • a job that allows some creative license and diversity
  • a quiet place to work that doesn't isolate me entirely
  • time for silence, in my head and externally
  • better skills at identifying and expressing what I need
  • a strong approach that motivates and inspires others instead of pissing them off
  • time for exercise and some motivation to do it
  • a feeling of being accepted
  • an environment where I can love people without fear of being taken advantage of
  • an environment where I can learn new skills, new perspectives and bounce ideas off of others
  • a place where I can feel safe from gossip, manipulation and PTSD triggers
  • enough time to rest
  • a place that supports my goal of healthy eating (meaning, I can bring or buy food and there isn't a lot of candy hanging around) and/or the tenacity to walk away from things like chocolate
  • the will power to ignore the negative, focus on the positive and take care of myself
  • time to write creatively and pursue my creative and spiritual interests
  • paying work that contributes something positive to society
  • a clean house
  • as much as possible, no "drama and trauma"
  • no push for me to be something I am not (like a counselor)
  • a place where real, sincere people work
  • resources for people in need and/or a place to refer people in need to
  • a mentor
  • wise friends
  • someone to help me function in society (in spite of my belief that it's a made-up system that isn't natural and often is self-defeating)
  • a place where I can be my very best self and work to my full potential
  • a job that takes out taxes and social security and allows me to save for retirement
  • vacation time and the money to take a vacation
  • self awareness, especially to know when I need a break or when people aren't understanding me
  • better "thinking on my feet" skills and time to process information
  • written guidelines and frequent reminders of them
  • training
  • reasonable challenges and goals
  • an ethical work environment
  • a place where, when I bring up problems that need to be addressed, I won't be penalized
  • bosses who don't micromanage, criticize in the negative sense or who are mean spirited
  • co-workers and bosses who aren't bullies and recognize when my brain is on overload
  • positive reinforcement and encouragement
  • patience with myself and from others
  • a schedule that makes sense for me and my family (though I've yet to determine what that is)
  • a place where I can be my weird self
I know this might sound like a lot, and it's certainly a list of the ideal, but really, I think most people want what I've got down here.  I guess I'm different in that I do need some accommodations and that I don't need to make a lot of money.  However, I want to be paid what I'm worth according to the sector I am working in.  I have no idea how I will find such a job.  I guess I'll have to start looking, though, once I complete the project I'm working on.
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